SO What Wednesday

It's Been FOREVER since I have done one of these.. but they're my favvvvvv. 

So What if:

I'm 39.5 weeks & still pregnant.. AND am irrational and absolutely convinced this child is staying in there forever.

I'm highly emotional and cry at e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. because #pregnancy

I finally gave into my donut craving and have had them almost every day. 

We also drove 30 miles out of our way just to get said Krispy Kreme donuts

I also ate 8 of the 12 by myself. 

I've washed the boppy cover 4x because it keeps getting put in places I think aren't clean. 

I also realized how stupid this was because it's going in our car, the hospital.. etc etc. 

I didn't think it through and had my last appointment on a Tuesday only to realize this appointment will be on a Friday! It's just so long to wait in between at this stage...

I changed my mind after yesterday's post and decided today I AM in fact ready for this little girl to make her appearance. These Braxton hicks are getting super annoying & with each one I find myself wishing they were painful contractions. 

Nothing helps with heartburn these days, I'll just start eating icecream for every meal. Specifically the cotton candy ice cream from Target that I found. That's right folks, go get yours today. (Not a paid advertisement, just a girl who loves cotton candy flavored anything ;)) 

Our new fridge wasn't able to be delivered until we will most likely be in the hospital.. At least we'll come home to a new fridge. Mom, could you be here to take care of that? ;)

We went to Target to try and walk this baby out and instead came home with stuff we didn't need. Shopping is my therapy. 

I'm seriously considering calling my Dr. to see if she has any earlier appointments this week. 

I'm super duper proud of myself for writing THREE blog posts this week. I honestly think it's been over a .. You're welcome. 

Happy Wednesday Friends! 😘 

39 Week 'bumpdate'

 39 Weeks!

HUGE difference in 9 weeks! 
Weight: 37 lbs. and I've topped out. I didn't gain anything two appointments ago & last week I lost a pound, which is really normal at this stage of pregnancy. However, I decided to eat ALL the donuts I wanted this past week so we'll see what the scale says at my dr appt ;)
Symptoms: all.the.symptoms. Let's see.. Heartburn (thank you for waking me up at 1 am and again at 3 am last night!), Braxton hicks..which are weird.. those started happening not too long after my last appointment..they start out almost like my belly goes up into my lungs and I have to catch my breath but not because they hurt. More.. back cramps, menstrual like cramps, sometimes headaches, constipation (sorry), nausea every once in a while if I don't eat for a few hours, fatigue, shortness of breath, so emotional (thanks so much hormones), hot flashes. Oh, and I am hungry all the time!

Clothes: all the maternity clothes. and only the bigger ones.. because I be showing belly if I try to squeeze into earlier trimester clothes. 

Sleep: hahahahaha! Between waking up every 1.5 hours to go to the bathroom, heartburn, pregnancy insomnia, sleep is pretty non-existent this days. So I just lay and stare at Nathan.. hating that he is snoring next to me.. 

Cravings/Aversions: Hey guys, I LOVE donuts. And after being really careful with not over indulging myself, I just went ahead and said oh what the hay.. I don't think I can count how many I've had in the past week. I'll give them up when baby comes. maybe. I also love smoothies, we have probably 2 a day.. and I have rekindled my love with Rita's Ice.. so there's that. I can finally eat lots these days and be extremely hungry again within an hour or two!
Baby- Little one is good! Her heart rate is always about 140-150 and she is usually pretty happy at appointments. She is getting rather large and I feel her everywhere.. I'm going to go ahead and guess she'll be .. 8 + pounds.. but hey, I'm not a Dr. 
Dr Appointment: Been the same with blood pressure.. it's still about 130-135/80 when I go in.. and then as soon as I lie down, it goes right back down to about 118/75 ish.. I don't have any protein in my urine, swelling, and after getting labs done to be safe, everything looks perfectly normal. My Dr. calls my high blood pressure "artificial" so she's keeping an eye on me.. but since it always goes down & since we monitor it at home (Dr. Nathan, y'all) and it's perfectly normal (except after that one trip to Costco but who can blame me) she's not too concerned. Alright so UPDATE on appointments. Yes, she started 'checking' me 3 weeks ago. The first one.. pretty much nothing. Second, a WHOLE centimeter and she was really low and Dr could feel her head! Third, TWO centimeters, 50% effaced and something about my water bulging..oh and she was pretty low and Dr could still feel the head... And TMI so STOP reading if you don't wanna hear it but I really want to remember this stuff! After my 2nd appointment I lost my..plug. Been 2 weeks tho.. so that clearly meant nothing. At my 37 week appointment  she stripped my membranes without me even knowing she was going to.. which irritated me because I didn't want her to until at least 38 weeks.. but I am OK now because baby girl stayed in. She did the same last week and I am assuming she will again if I make it to my appointment this Friday. Where I will be 39 weeks 5 days!! These appointments get my hopes up... then nothing happens. . 
  Movement: Pretty much consistent with what she has been doing all along. Has her little patterns and awake times. Still is pretty active around 7ish and when I wake up in the morning from insomnia around 5am or 6am.. She moves a little different now that she is taking up so much room.. just less strong as I don't think she is able to really KICK me hard anymore but she rolls around and switches sides.. She moves her little feet a lot and rolls them across my belly. Her bum is straight up by my lungs and if I push on her she'll usually let me know she doesn't appreciate that ;)
  How I am feeling: For real, I am feeling pretty good. Yes, I have all the annoying symptoms but I really am OK. I was always feeling like she would come late so I was OK with that until a couple weeks ago people started commenting that I look "done" or "wow I bet you want that baby out" "or don't lie, I know you just have to be miserable.." so for about a week.. I decided they were right. And I was on.. "operation, let's get this baby out"... but now.. I am just fine with her waiting. Even if it were for 2 more weeks.. I LOVE having her safe and happy in my tummy. I love feeling her move around and I love that I get more time with Nathan. There's no going back after this folks and I am fine with her being in there as long as she is OK. Yes, I want to see her. Sometimes the feeling is so overwhelming I cry because I want to see her sweet little face and snuggle her all the time. But right now, I still get to carry her and bond with her while she rolls around in my tummy and I am perfectly content with that. So no, I am not "done" yet. I feel joy with it and honestly still cannot believe she has been in there for 39 weeks! I've had a burst of energy this past week so I'm really liking that! 

How daddy's feeling: "I feel like a little kid waiting for christmas morning… I want to meet my little one."
Random: A LOT has gone on since my last update! I had another shower that my mama and sister through for me and it was perfect! I am SO thankful for everyone's generosity and love towards us and our little girl! I'm completely packed and so is baby girls stuff for the hospital. I have everything for baby girl done and we have even set up her co-spleeper. We chose this one if you're interested (more on that another time.) My Spotify play list, an ipod player and of course the camera are chillin' out next to my bag. Since I have had the urge to nest, all of her cloth diapers are washed, stuffed and ready to go! They're so darn cute I can't wait to put her in them! (more on that later too!) Her nursery has been ready for some time now and everything has been washed, prepped, put away etc. Every thing has been set up, ie, her bouncer, stroller, sheets on bed, clothes put away and all washed, headbands in their place, closet organized, etc ..and has been for a while. Her car seat is in the car and ready along with a mirror so we can see her! We actually took the car seat to the fire dept just to make sure we were installing it correctly. He had some great tips and there were a couple of things I didn't even know you could do to get a car seat in! I guess stuff I would just consider 'against the rules' but it turns out the highway safety or something recommends and allows certain things. I printed out our 'Birth wishes' and they are in my bag.. yes, I am THAT person but I have done a LOT of research to prepare and I just don't want decisions to be made for us without me knowing anything. Yes, I am OK with things changing and I know you cannot have everything you want usually, but I trust in a BIG God and I know He has everything handled with the birth. They are things we have been specifically praying about since finding out about our daughter and we know God is in control and will be with us every second. 
Other Stuff:  So.. I won't go swimming because I have an irrational fear that my water will break while I'm in there and I won't know it..  so there's that. I have also been squeezing in every single minute I can alone with my husband. We pretty much don't do anything except hang out together and eat. A lot. of donuts. We've been having random breakfast and lunch dates and trips to Lowes for stuff like a new fridge. We've been walking a lot to help move the baby down and most nights we're sitting on the couch playing Lego Indiana Jones on the Wii together! I'm seriously loving every minute of it!

Last thing: Would love all of your prayers as we enter into a part of our lives we know nothing could possibly prepare us for! We just ask that you would be praying for our family of three, that the Lord would be guiding us and teaching us to be the best parents possible for our girl. For the birth and after, nursing & just settling into our lives together. Thank you so so much and we can't wait to share the big news with you! 

Check out my other Pregnancy related posts!   Becoming Parents I'm Pregnant and I'm Beautiful  34 Week 'Bumpdate' 30 Week 'Bumpdate' 27&28 Week 'Bumpdate' 25 week 'Bumpdate' 24 Week 'Bumpdate' 22 & 23 Week 'Bumpdate' 21 Week 'Bumpdate' 19 & 20 Week 'Bumpdate' 17 & 18 Week 'Bumpdate' 16 Week 'Bumpdate'  14 & 15 Week 'Bumpdate'  13 Week 'Bumpdate' 0-12 Weeks 'Bumpdate' Pregnancy Announcement   If you want to see more of the bump, let's be friends on Instagram!

I'm pregnant & I'm beautiful.

In the early months of pregnancy when I started getting a bump, I thought it was sooooo cute. I loved watching it grow bigger and bigger & was amazed that my body was able to hold a little person. 

As time went on, I got more uncomfortable in my skin and began to think I was looking a lot more chubby and a lot less cute. Stretch marks started developing (literally everywhere except my belly and it bothered me. (Don't worry, belly ones came later;)) 

When I got to about 37- 38 weeks I realized what I had been doing. I had a hard time with the weight gain & it started making me not like being pregnant. I was ready to lose the weight, ready to have my baby girl, and ready to have my body back to normal. I think it should also be said that I watched other friends struggle with this and always thought to myself " I would never struggle with that if I were pregnant. Pregnancy is so gorgeous, why would they think they look fat?"  I was sorely mistaken. 

Like I said it wasn't until about 38 weeks along that I started to see myself differently. I noticed I started to be sad that I wouldn't be pregnant anymore. I saw other pregnant woman who were beautiful! Woman who had gained almost 70 pounds and looked absolutely stunning.  This particular girl I had found via Instagram and started catching up on her bump dates on her blog. And wouldn't you know it, she also thought she didn't look so pretty.

It's funny how I could look at her & think how absolutely beautiful she looked but then look at myself and think the opposite. It's when I saw this blog that I changed my view. She too thought she had gained too much weight & was struggling with how she looked. 

As I looked at her pictures, I realized how hard I had been on myself. How truly beautiful it was that I was growing a little baby girl & how I might never get this experience again. I started seeing myself differently. Even though I only had 2 weeks left, I wanted to get dressed and go out and show off my bump. I started to truly believe my husband when he would say "you look so beautiful" or "how sexy my baby bump made me look." I started to say thank you & let it make me joyful when someone would compliment me. I posted this photo in Instagram and shared my feelings. And I truly appreciate everyone of your sweet words that were completely unexpected, but I believed you for once! 

Pregnancy is so so beatiful and such a privilege. I don't even think I realized how blessed I was. So I don't care anymore if people call me "huge" (although a post is coming on those little comments later ;)) I'm honestly just in awe of how beautiful this big ole round belly is. How unfair of me to ever think anything different when The Lord granted me a womb that could conceive a child. The body that The Lord gave me has carried a child, Our child, His child and He created me to hold her little body and nourish her and keep her safe. He gave me a body that would be her home for 9 months. He grew it and shaped it and made it the perfect place for our little baby to grow. And so, I love it. 

34 weeks 'Bumpdate'

Weight: 35lbs. Ya ya, I'm fine with it. And healthy so please, no unsolicited comments ;) 
Symptoms: Exhaustion! I would like to sleep all the time please! Heartburn like WOAH. random cramping and acheyness in my belly & lower still. Acne, thank you hormones. We went to camp last week and I walked everywhere.. needless to say I got pretty swollen in my feet but now that I have been home, they've looked pretty normal. Stretch marks are literally everywhere except my belly! How weird is that! 

Clothes: Maternity. All. It's so hot I usually can't even handle a maxi dress/skirt. 

Sleep: I've actually been sleeping a little better. Pregnancy insomnia hasn't been terrible anymore unless I am anxious about something and cannot sleep. I've just been so tired that I will get what I can. Nonetheless, I still use the restroom at lease 4x a night.    Cravings/Aversions: Trail mix, pop tarts and Mexican food. I still love pineapple and Starbucks. I have noticed I am starting to dislike certain foods again.. just things that sound gross to me but I can't really recall what they are.. 
Baby- Little love is good. We got to see her on an ultrasound to check her size and she is in the 59th percentile measuring 5.25 lbs. Dr was very happy with this and said she thinks she will be about 7.5 - 8 lbs which I am perfectly fine with. She also showed us her sweet little face & I think she looks JUST like her daddy. He disagrees but I'm telling you.. that is his daughter! ;) OH! And she was head down this time.. a couple weeks ago she was breech.. so that's good! Let's hope she stays put. 

Dr Appointment:  I've had a couple since I last updated this.. everything is pretty normal.. This week my Blood Pressure was  little high when I went in so she had me lie down and check it again. Within a couple minutes.. it had already gone down to perfect so they weren't concerned. 
  Movement: Hiccups at least once a day now! Moving during her usual patterns. Noticed one of her big times is around 7:30 at night and when I wake up to use the restroom, she is almost always up with me but not always. She loves her daddy's voice and will typically move around when he reads to her or talks to my belly. She also will poke back if I push on her.. again.. not always and I have a feeling we may have a stubborn little girl on our hands.  I honestly have NO idea how people can tell what body part is moving or where their babies are positioned. This may be different for me since I have an anterior placenta blocking a lot of what she does in there.. but I just never have understood that.. Also her movements are strong.. and they don't always feel good! Sometimes she'll be in a certain spot a while and it feels sore. Other times she will move and cause a shooting pain in certain areas.. so that's fun! 
  How I am feeling: Feeling pretty good for the most part. I have aches and pains more now and I am feeling pretty anxious of the unknown. People keep asking me if I'm "ready" and the answer is still "not really." I would love to meet my little girl but I still don't feel "done." I feel like I have too much to do and I want her to stay in there as long as she needs until she is ready. I know The Lord has the perfect time in mind and that's good enough for me!

How daddy's feeling: "I'm real excited to meet her! There have been few things in life I've looked forward to .. Marriage was one of them and having a baby is another. Really looking forward to seeing this little one." 
Random: Baby Shower numero uno was this past weekend! It was so so amazing. April, Kecia.. you are really the best! I am so thankful for all the awesome gifts we got for baby girl! It truly is overwhelming how many people already love our little girl!  Birthing classes have been ... fun... Our first class.. our very old instructor told us we wouldn't need our mats because she felt the floor was too dirty.. so we don't get to do any of the exercises which we were both bummed about. I also have never been afraid of birth until watching some of the videos. Scared of being a good mom? Yes. But never the labor.. and now I can say that thoroughly has me worried now. I'm not afraid of the pain.. just complications & such. Either way, I keep praying and I know the Lord has already prepared her birth long before she was ever in my tummy! 

Other Stuff:  Been getting every spare minute alone with Nathan as I can. If we have nights with nothing planned, I am so thankful. I just want to stare at him.. creepy? Yes. That's fine.. I love my husband and as excited as I am to see our little girl, I know we will never get this time back with just us. 
Check out my other Pregnancy related posts!   Becoming Parents 27&28 Week 'Bumpdate' 25 week 'Bumpdate' 24 Week 'Bumpdate' 22 & 23 Week 'Bumpdate' 21 Week 'Bumpdate' 19 & 20 Week 'Bumpdate' 17 & 18 Week 'Bumpdate' 16 Week 'Bumpdate'  14 & 15 Week 'Bumpdate'  13 Week 'Bumpdate' 0-12 Weeks 'Bumpdate' Pregnancy Announcement   If you want to see more of the bump, let's be friends on Instagram!

Week 30 'Bumpdate!'

30 Weeks!  (That's my, "I just woke up, from barely sleeping, let's get a picture," look)

Weight: 26lbs. 
Symptoms: SO exhausted! Which explains the lack of posts! This week it has really hit me and I want to nap, all day long, desperately. I really do not know how pregnant woman work on their feet all day.. y'all are amazing. Speaking of exhaustion.. this could partly be due to the new found pregnancy insomnia I have been experiencing. I don't know how I have never mentioned this is previous posts but I also get horrible breakouts and have since the beginning thanks to hormones. Nothing really helps and I don't like to use anything that isn't natural so I just look like a teenager! My legs have been hurting if I do too much and I had another horrible charlie horse after waking up the other day. My hips still hurt at night if I am on one side for too long. I also am just generally achey-ish.. My tummy is tight a lot and I unfortunately still deal with constipation although it's definitely not as bad. I have noticed a tiny bit of swelling but nothing too bad. I have also been getting little snippets of morning sickness again. There have been a couple of days I felt so nauseous, I had to just go lay down. I'm back to trying to eat every 2 hours again so that this won't happen. 

Clothes: Well.. most of my pregnancy shorts have gotten too small. They feel too tight to wear so I have been wearing as many dresses/skirts as possible. They say to order your pre-pregnancy size.. but I have grown in more than just my belly.. so I just don't see how that can be true! So I ordered some more (bigger sizes) with a gift card I had to Old Navy just to get me through the next 3 months. I ordered a dress there early on that was a small (and was rather big on me!) and it's now too tight. My belly is certainly not the only thing that grew... I think my hips and thighs have doubled. ;)

Sleep: Pregnancy Insomnia is NO joke. I usually wake up at 4 or 5 am and cannot go back to sleep. Sometimes earlier. No matter how tired I am .. it's just not happening. I always thought I might just bypass this.. but I didn't get so lucky ;) That mixed with the ridiculous amount of times I still get up to use the bathroom.. I don't get much good sleep.    Cravings/Aversions: I still love me some chocolate. I am soooo glad my 3-hour glucose test was OK because I just could not fathom giving up my beloved sweets! I love burgers lately and have been REALLY hungry. The fullness I had in the second-trimester was enough to make me have small bites of something and be done, but it's been better lately and I feel very hungry. Oh, and I love Starbucks again.. which is terrible and I MAKE myself limit it because of how expensive it. I do get decaf most of the time but I just love the taste.  I HATE prune juice. The thought of it actually makes me want to vomit but I do drink it sometimes.. when necessary.. 
Baby- Our girl is doing good. Heart rate has been in the 140's. She's growing like crazy and according to my app, she is the size of a cucumber at 16 inches and could be 3+ pounds!!
Dr Appointment:  Went back in for the 3-hour glucose test.. and passed! Yay! My fasting was really good and so were the other three so everything was good! Baby Girl's heartbeat was in the 140's this week and and had been active right before my appointment. I am really enjoying this every 2 weeks thing.. Feels like I don't have to wait as long to ask all my crazy questions :) 
  Movement: She still has specific times during the day where she will move. Normally, right when I get up, she is the most active. If I have a really sweet drink, she will also be moving like crazy but other than that, she seems to be a very chill baby. Some of my friends will tell me their baby moves all day long and that has just never been the case with her. It makes me a little sad (and sometimes worried!) but she is moving in all the amounts she should and is very healthy so.. I guess I just don't have a very active baby! That and I know because of the location of my placenta, I have to pay more attention to her movements because I can't feel them as strong.. especially since I am almost positive she moved positions and I think she is right behind it now. I used to feel her on the sides but she must have moved head down because I only feel her low or up in my ribs now. I have been feeling hiccups like crazy finally! I always thought maybe she just didn't have them but she certainly does! The other day she had them 3 times in one day and has had them at least once a day since I began feeling them. It's pretty cute!    How I am feeling: Feeling ...tired haha. I have been wanting to see her more and more and have been imagining her in my tummy whenever she kicks. It's just becoming so real that we will have her with us in 10 weeks (give or take!) 30 weeks seemed so far away to me and now it feels like such a big number! With that has definitely come more anxiety! I know my hormones definitely play a role in this and I am so, so grateful for having been equipped with how to deal with anxiety a while before I was ever pregnant. Also having the most understanding husband who is always reassuring me & speaking truth to me doesn't hurt! ;) I am also feeling excited to see her sweet little face. I have had dreams of nursing her and bonding and I am so looking forward to that time with her. It should also be said.. I had a dream I had triplets. Ha..  

How Daddy's feeling: "FEELING EXCITED TO SEE BABY GIRL."
Random: We have a 4-D ultrasound coming up this Friday! We scheduled this a while ago because we wanted to give our family the opportunity to come with us and be a part of one. I really hope she shows us her sweet little face! I cannot wait to see which one of us she looks more like and which features she has! I will also get to see how she is positioned!  We had our very first Baby class last night on breastfeeding. We really liked our instructor and it was good to hear all the information. Although I have done a ton of research on it, it was so helpful to see (with props of course) some really great ways to nurse your baby. 

Other Stuff:  Nathan & I leave Saturday for a mini-stayca/babymoon & I am SO excited. It is our absolute favorite thing to just hang out with each other by a pool somewhere. I am soaking up every last minute alone with him! This past weekend, my aunt took me for a spa day and we had so much fun! I have been desperately trying to think of something to get my mama for all she's been doing for us (and always has!) and Mother's Day of course.. and after this past weekend, I knew something like that would be the perfect gift & a way to spend time with her so we have that all set for June! Next week we have our maternity pictures! Then in 2 weeks we leave for Youth Camp.. I am just praying I can't get through the weekend (and all the walking!) and looking forward to cooler weather! Everything seems to be happening so fast!
Check out my other Pregnancy related posts!   Becoming Parents 27&28 Week 'Bumpdate' 25 week 'Bumpdate' 24 Week 'Bumpdate' 22 & 23 Week 'Bumpdate' 21 Week 'Bumpdate' 19 & 20 Week 'Bumpdate' 17 & 18 Week 'Bumpdate' 16 Week 'Bumpdate'  14 & 15 Week 'Bumpdate'  13 Week 'Bumpdate' 0-12 Weeks 'Bumpdate' Pregnancy Announcement   If you want to see more of the bump, let's be friends on Instagram!